There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
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