Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
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