Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
