Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
This is the high leading the old right now
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
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