I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Randomize
