Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
This baby is an asshole
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
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