with your own penis?
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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