Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
