We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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