just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
