I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
