Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Randomize
