ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
He kissed a someone with a penis
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
