you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
