just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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