I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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