If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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