This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize