and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
