This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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