i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
accomplished twins. life is a go
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
