i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
