4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
