you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
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