I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
