Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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