I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize