Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
