Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Randomize
