i think i have herpe
just one?
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
