Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
