She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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