the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
