foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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