Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
