Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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