That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Hippo gnu deer
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize
