Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
