I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Randomize
