Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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