it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
