so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Randomize