It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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