Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
