I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
