rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
