question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
