I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Randomize
