Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
It's Friday. Sex?
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
