is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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